I apoligize for not posting on Friday as promised, but there really was nothing exciting to report. As expected, the surgeon is convinced that treating the cancer is more important than removing Marye's gall bladder right now. He's right, of course. The complications of a cholesystectomy far outweigh any possible benefit from the procedure, especially since she needs to be on chemotherapy as soon as possible. In addition to the other things we already knew, we learned that starting chemo soon after surgery really complicates the healing from the incisions. That makes sense since chemotherapy affects her immune system, which is obviously important anytime they perform major surgery. It would be at least four weeks before she could start chemo, and that's too long. So..... Marye is scheduled to go back on chemo on Thursday morning. This is nothing new- or unexpected.
In my last post, I talked briefly about taking the challenges of cancer and incorporating them into your life without complaining too much. I received a lot of positive feedback from readers of this blog who were moved by that sentiment. So it's with some sadness that I have to report that although I really believed those words when I was writing them, I haven't been feeling that way lately. I know it's natural to go through ups and downs of dealing with a challenge of this magnitude (cancer is but one of any number of situations that present similar challenges), but getting ready for chemo this time has been tough, especially for me.
I think a part of it is that she's been off therapy for a few months, so it was like a mini-remission, of sorts. When this whole thing started, we were told she would need chemotherapy for the rest of her life. Because the cancer metasticized, she would never go into remission. This was something that we knew and accepted. But then she got sick with her gall bladder, and even though that was terrible and she almost died, it gave us something else to focus on besides the cancer, especially since she really couldn't take the chemo. However, that is now over, and the cancer is front and center again. So while it is something that is very familiar to us, it is kind of like running head-first into the brick wall of cancer all over again. Or, more accurately, like I said in my last post, just when you get into a nice rhythm, cancer slaps you in the face to remind you that it is still there.
Anyway, that's where we stand. She's got chemotherapy on Thursday. Her hair will fall out again. The good news is that she doesn't actually fear chemo since she's tolerated it very well, thus far. But there are side-effects-- more fatigue, neuropathy, feeling generally run-down. Also, we've yet to see how she handles it since her gall bladder issues. She's not as strong as she was, so it may affect her more this time around. Time will tell. I should post again sometime over the weekend with an update.
Thanks for listening.
-Chris
